We got an appointment for Mark at MD Anderson this coming Tuesday! We will be leaving on Monday so that we can be there for an 8:30 appointment Tuesday morning. Mark is so excited! This is the most hopeful I have seen him since his diagnosis, so it is very exciting for me as well. Mark is supposed to be getting his stitches out on Tuesday, so I will have to change that appointment. We are keeping his appointments here on Wednesday with the neuro-oncologist and his neurologist, so we will have to come back Tuesday evening. Then we will make our decision about what to do once we have all of the information we need. Mark has really decided that if MDA will accept him, he wants to do his treatment there instead of here. There would be a lot of benefits to doing that even if it was the same treatment plan as here. Although it would be really hard for us to be away from the boys for so long, it would probably be safer for Mark to be away from them. For example, the boys both have a virus right now, and during Chemo that would be dangerous for Mark. Mark's parents have offered to take care of the boys while we are gone if we end up going to Houston for an extended amount of time. They said they would bring the boys to us on the weekends, which is just so incredibly nice! I can't wait until Tuesday to find out for sure what we will be doing so that we can get all of the plans in order for that trip. We have read many encouraging things about what MDA offers for cancer paitents. We want to try the best of everything and have no regrets even if it means we have to make some financial and emotional sacrifices.
I talked to my doctor about my back and he wants me to have the surgery right away, but if we go to Houston, that will just not be at all possible for right now. I really don't want to have the surgery until Mark is recovered from his treatment anyway, so I have to see if I can get him to work with me on pain management until then.
I had my last day at CLC so that I can be with Mark for all of his treatment. I am really going to miss my kids there, but I know this is what I need to do. I am praying for him to recover quickly so that I can return when it starts back in the Fall.
We have not told the boys yet about the cancer. I know that is something that they will not be able to really comprehend, so I don't know how/what to tell them. I want to see if I can find some books or something with ideas on what to say and how to explain it to them.
Mark has started to open up some about his feelings. He kept it all to himself for a long time and he just finally told me some of his fears and the things he has been praying about and thinking about. I think I might look for some specialized counceling for us to go to as well.
I have had my moments of crying since we got the pathology news, but Thursday was the most emotional day for me yet. I'm not sure why, but I could not stop crying that day. I cried hard for several hours straight. I didn't want the boys to worry, so I spent some time just sitting on the front porch letting the tears flow. I finally got myself together and I've been doing much better since then. Now I'm in a determined stage I guess. I just keep telling Mark how we are going to fight our hardest against this cancer and that we are going to pray continually for a miracle.
It's been difficult, but the blessings have continued. We are still being covered in love and prayers. Meals are still coming on a regular basis so that we don't have to worry about cooking. My mom researched and brought us the information about MD Anderson that led us to call them and get an appointment. We are still getting cards and calls from people to let us know that they are praying for us. People are offereing to help in any way they can, including to help take care of the boys, which is what we will be needing most during Mark's treatment. A fundraiser has been set up for us, which is just amazing! We have not had to worry about finances recently, but we are not totally certain about all of the financial matters since Mark will be going on short term disability soon, so the fundraiser is an amazing blessing! Mark is still doing better and better each day. He can walk really well now and doesn't need any more assistance getting around. He still has no pain, and he has had no seizures since the surgery. Mark's parents have done so much for us, especially helping us with the boys and with staying with Mark when I need to do things.
Although this has been a very hard time for our family, we have not lost faith. We know that God is in control and we are excited to see exactly what good He is going to bring from our struggle!